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se and notice were more restraining than his indifference。 I could no longer talk or laugh freely when he was by; because a tiresomely importunate instinct reminded me that vivacity (at least in me) was distasteful to him。 I was so fully aware that only serious moods and occupations were acceptable; that in his presence every effort to sustain or follow any other became vain: I fell under a freezing spell。 When he said “go;” I went; “e;” I came; “do this;” I did it。 But I did not love my servitude: I wished; many a time; he had continued to neglect me。

One evening when; at bedtime; his sisters and I stood round him; bidding him good…night; he kissed each of them; as was his custom; and; as ; he gave me his hand。 Diana; who chanced to be in a frolicsome humour (She was not painfully controlled by his will; for hers; in another way; was as strong); exclaimed—

“St。 John! you used to call Jane your third sister; but you don’t treat her as such: you should kiss her too。”

She pushed me towards him。 I thought Diana very provoking; and felt unfortably confused; and while I was thus thinking and feeling; St。 John bent his head; his Greek face was brought to a level y eyes piercingly—he kissed me。 There are no such things as marble kisses or ice kisses; or I should say my ecclesiastical cousin’s salute belonged to one of these classes; but there may be experiment kisses; and his was an experiment kiss。 When given; he viewed me to learn the result; it was not striki

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